Purity Thursday: A Grievous Connection You Must Make

Someone suggested this video for a Purity Thursday post. It exposes the very real connection between porn and human trafficking.



HT: JT

Hypocrisy And How I Feel

Erik Thoennes (found here, boldface added):

There's this idea that to live out of conformity with how I feel is hypocrisy; but that's a wrong definition of hypocrisy. To live out of conformity to what I believe is hypocrisy. To live in conformity with what I believe, in spite of what I feel, isn't hypocrisy; it's integrity. 

Another way to say this is: there is a world of difference between faking it and fighting it.

You wake up in the morning feeling blue. You're down and you're not even sure why. What is the authentic Christian response? Put on a happy face and bury your emotions? Choke it down and get on with your day, pretending you're fine? That is faking it.

Is the only other alternative to drag through the day like Eeyore? Is that the most authentic way to live?

Take 2. You wake up feeling depressed. You don't want to even get out of bed. You just want to throw in the towel. What is the authentic Christian response?

Is this authentic? Psalm 42:5-6, 8-9, 11:

Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation and my God. My soul is cast down within me; therefore I remember you... 

By day the LORD commands his steadfast love, and at night his song is with me, a prayer to the God of my life. I say to God, my rock: "Why have you forgotten me? Why do I go mourning because of the oppression of the enemy?" ... 

Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation and my God.

Or this? Psalm 103:1-5:

Bless the LORD, O my soul, and all that is within me, bless his holy name! Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits, who forgives all your iniquity, who heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit, who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy, who satisfies you with good so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.

If you preach to yourself like the Psalmist, fighting back the blues, rehearsing God's grace, grasping for hope and joy despite how you feel, is that the same as faking it? No. It's called the fight of faith. It's the REAL Christian life in a broken, painful world where God, still seated on his throne, is doing something about it.

Fasting: What, Why, How

Last Sunday, Alex Kirk preached on fasting and challenged us to complete one 24 hour fast in the month of January. His message was part 2 of a series entitled "Renewing Disciplines,." If you missed Alex's message (or Pastor Tyler's message on prayer), be sure to take the time to listen. 

A few years ago, I addressed the topic of fasting and we placed an insert in the bulletin with some basic info on the what, why, and how of fasting. Someone wrote me this week and suggested that we make it available again as we follow through on Alex's challenge. So, here it is (slightly updated):

Fasting: What, Why, How

1) What is fasting? 

“Voluntary abstinence from food for spiritual purposes” (Whitney, Spiritual Disciplines of Christian Life).

2) Why fast? 

There is no spiritual magic to fasting. We can never manipulate or coerce God (Ps. 115:3). Fasting is not a means of meriting favor or earning blessings. We can never put God in our debt (Rom. 11:35). Fasting, instead, is a God-ordained means of GRACE, just like prayer.

God doesn’t need our prayers, but prayer is a normal means of grace. God doesn’t need our fasts, but fasting is a normal means of grace. Jesus clearly said “when you fast,” not “if you fast” (Mt. 6:16).

Sometimes the motivation for fasting is spontaneous. The need is so great that you can’t do otherwise (e.g. a wayward child, devastating loss, etc.). Usually, however, the motivation will flow out of a settled desire to see change (e.g. a spiritual breakthrough), seek guidance on a major decision, or experience God’s blessing (Mt. 6:18) in some important aspect of life.

The purpose of fasting is to deny physical hunger for the sake of heightening hunger for God and His will. You “say” with a fast:

“God, I want you and your blessing more than I want food.”

“I do not want to be mastered by anything but you.”

“I don’t want my stomach to be my god. I want you to rule me, not my appetites. You are my God.”

3) How do you fast?

A few practical bits of advice might help as you take up Alex’s invitation to fast for at least one 24 hour period in the month of January:

Work your way into it.  If you’re not a runner, it’s not wise to begin with 5 miles on your first day. Start with one or two meals the first time and work your way from there.

Replace your normal meal time with time in prayer. The physical hunger pains remind you of the purpose of your fast. They can serve as alarm clocks for prayer.

Feed your faith with the promise of Matt 6:18. It helps to remind yourself why you’re doing this fast, and what you’re after.

Grab a sticky note and write "What I'm hungry for today:" on the top. Make a short bullet list of the purposes for your fast to guide your prayers throughout the day.

Drink water. There’s nothing spiritual about dehydration.

  

Expect it to be a struggle. Don’t be too quick to give in or depend on something other than God. Remember (Alex made this point so well in his message): the irritability, impatience, etc. that rise up are not reasons to quit. Fasting often functions like spiritual detox, exposing the sludge that is in our souls. 

Modify if necessary. Assuming the previous point, some people find they do much better if they drink a little juice while they fast. They simply get too weak and can't function well without it. You might be one of them.

Don’t be mechanical. Be sure not to think about fasting in mechanical or formulaic terms. This is a relational process with your Heavenly Father (e.g. – “If I drink a little juice in the morning, does it still count?”).

If you can’t fast for health reasons (e.g. pregnancy, diabetes), don’t feel guilty. The Lord knows your physical limitations. You can still set aside time to seek him with special intensity.

 

For further study see the chapter on fasting in Whitney’s Spiritual Disciplines of the Christian Life or A Hunger For God by John Piper.

Purity Thursday: Lust and Lot's Wife

Remember Lot’s wife? She was turned to a pillar of salt when, against the stern warning of the angel of the LORD, she looked back to Sodom (Genesis 19:15-26).

Why did she look back? Was it because she was curious and wanted to watch the pyrotechnics? No. It was because she was leaving her home. She wasn't willing to turn her back on and “die to” that ungodly place…and she died. 

She was turned to a pillar of salt as a very vivid illustration of an important truth found in Psalm 135:15-18 (emphasis added):

The idols of the nations are silver and gold, the work of human hands. They have mouths, but do not speak; they have eyes, but do not see; they have ears, but do not hear, nor is there any breath in their mouths. Those who make them become like them, so do all who trust in them.

In the words of Greg Beale, “People resemble what they revere, to their restoration or their ruin.” Or, others have said it something like this, “We all tend, by a secret law of the soul, to become like what we admire.” 

Lot’s wife valued that worldly place. She was too attached to it. She didn’t want to see it destroyed. And she was ruined. She became like the city that was being “salted” with fire. 

This story has something to say about our battle with lust. Why do we take a second look when we're tempted? The Bible gives us many serious and sober warnings -- warnings that make it clear our souls could be at stake. 

Matthew 5:27-30:

"You have heard that it was said, 'You shall not commit adultery.' But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell.

So, why do we look? It is because there is too much worldly desire in us. We love the world too much – the lust of the eyes and lust of the flesh (1 John 2:15-17). We are unwilling to die to that temptation and run to safety. We value what that temptation offers more than we value God’s promises of purity and holiness.

We should soberly take heed here. The desire to "look back" at The City of Man, the world with its lusts, must be met with ruthless action. Your soul is at stake! Whoever looks at a woman (or man) with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 

Am I saying that one second or lustful look and God will zap you? No. But don't fail to consider the fact that he would be just to do so. Adultery is deserving of destruction. Our lustful looks are like that look back to Sodom. They must be resisted. If you don’t make war with your desire to look, it may lead to your destruction.

Let the pillar of salt that was Lot’s wife be a reminder. And let’s turn and fix our eyes on Jesus, running the race set before us. 

Purity Thursday: The Ironic Modesty of Lust

Have you ever noticed how modest lust is?

It covers itself well. It wears a thousand dresses. It co-opts sunglasses for cover. It strains peripheral vision to avoid being seen. It masquerades its clicks and google searches as “cultural curiosity” and “I wonder who that actress/actor is.” It cloaks itself behind descriptions like “appreciation of art (or beauty)” to keep from being exposed.

Ironic. You’d think lust would only deal in immodesty.

So, why is lust so modest?

Because it’s shameful. And what is shameful wants to be hidden.

Why is it shameful?

Because it desires to see what ought to be hidden. That selfish desire is perverted. Thus the need for modesty. What is perverted, if it’s going to be accepted, must be inverted or cloaked to hide its perversion.

This is not how God desires us to live. His will is for us to walk in the light and walk in love. Love is the inverse of lust. And love has nothing to hide. Love is honorable and can be exposed without shame.

Let’s not be fooled by the deceptive modesty of lust. Instead, let’s expose it for what it is. When we run openly to the light, we will have nothing to hide.

Let’s live provocatively in the light that others may see our good deeds and be drawn out of the shadows to live in the Light of the world.

See Ephesians 5:1-20, John 3:16-21, 1 John 1:5-10, and Matthew 5:14-16.

Eat This Book in 2015

If you don't plan to feed your soul in 2015, you're likely to suffer from spiritual anemia.

Jesus made it very clear in Matthew 4:4, "'Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God.'"

So, right about now is a great time to make a plan. If you want to peruse a plethora of options, you can find them here.

If you want a really simple approach, you can print out a copy of this Bible bookmark and stick it in your Bible. Check off the books as you finish them, and you'll easily know what ground you've covered and where to go next.

So, if you eat the Word in 2015, do you know what you can expect to happen? You have God's word that you will experience blessing. Rootedness and stability. Soul-satisfaction. Fruitfulness. Durability. Soul-flourishing.

Psalm 1:1-4

Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers; but his delight is in the law of the LORD, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water that yields its fruit in its season, and its leaf does not wither. In all that he does, he prospers. The wicked are not so, but are like chaff that the wind drives away.

Sound good? Are you hungry? Eat this book in 2015.

How Not To Make Disciples

If nothing else, let's make this one resolution for 2015: that we will actually seek to make disciples, not just read or think or talk about making disciples.

A convicting and refreshingly clear video of Francis Chan: 

Matthew 28:18-20

And Jesus came and said to them, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age."

McGarvey Christmas Letter

Dear family & friends,

Merry Christmas! For the annual McGarvey family round-up, we’ll go with a sort of year-in-pictures / kid interview format.

I’d love to begin with a picture that captures my sentiments exactly for my sweet wife of 18 years.

Amen!

Hannah recently put together a little slide show of pictures of us for our 18^th anniversary. One of the things Beth said after viewing it captures well how very gracious God has been. She said, “As I watched the slideshow, I realized that it didn’t kick up any bad or painful memories.” What grace to produce and preserve such peace in our marriage over the years!

I was a pirate in a former life. Beth was an indie rocker. We're perfect for each other.

This covenant love has produced quite a lot – most notably these five wonderful image bearers:

Ben (3) is one funny guy. He keeps us all smiling.

Do not -- I repeat -- do not try to take this guy's burger. He might bite!

Actually, he's quite the gentlemanly defender and protector.

Ben sometimes moonlights as a boy-king in the Far East.

Excerpts from the interview with Ben: 

If you were stranded on a desert island for a year what three things would you want to have? 

"Trains."

"What else, Ben?"

"It’s just trains."

"You need 2 more things."

"Sand."

"There would be plenty of that already there."

"Buckets, and a shovel."

           

What is your favorite thing about our family? "Mommy"

What are the most important qualities in a friend? "Mommy"

What do you want to be when you grow up? "Oh, maybe a monster."

If you could travel to one place? "Barnes & Noble"

What are your dreams for your life?
"Uh, dreams? I dreamed about mom."
"What did you dream?"
"I cried."
???

Favorite food? "Goldfish" (he was eating them at the time)

Favorite drink? "Apple juice."

Favorite vegetable? "Probaly broccoli"

Favorite superhero? "Oh! The Incredibles!"

Favorite color? "Oh. It’s probaly orange."

Favorite person? "Mommy!"

Favorite toy? "Trains"

Favorite thing to do? "Play with trains"

Jonathan "Jono" (7) is a wonderful combition of meekness and tenacity.

Jono got to go to his first Phillies game this year!

You never know what will emerge from the basement on Saturday mornings. 

Pronto Pups! An essential ingredient in the special "Dude Time" Dad has with Jono in MI on vacation.

Excerpts from the interview with Jono (7):

The desert island Q:
"Food -- healthy, and water, and ... supplies?"
"That last one was way too general."
"A metal detector."

If you could be in a movie you’ve seen, what character would you be? Why?

"Big Hero Six." (He hasn’t seen this movie.) "And Fred."
"Why Fred?"
"Because he’s cool and he can jump super high and shoot fire out of his mouth. He’s Fredzilla."

What is the hardest part about being your age?

"That I always have to clean up. And going to school."

What is the best part about being your age?

"I get to play Legos a lot. And I don’t have to have that much homework."

What is your favorite Bible verse and/or truth about God?

"John 3:16 ... and Eph 6:1-2"
To that second one, “Really?”
“Well, I SOMETIMES do it.”

If you could be an animal for a day, which one would you choose?

(without hesitation) "A Florida panther because they have super stealth, night vision, retractable claws, and they have really far jumping and they can climb trees very well, and they have really cute babies – BUT NOT THE BOYS!" (i.e. the boys don’t have the babies)

If you could have a time machine, what time in history would you visit?

"Definitely not the Pharaoh time, cause he would try to kill me."

If you could be a superhero, which one and why?

"Hulk, Well, no. Colossus. Because he’s superstrong, metal folds out on him and he’s invincible."
"Why do you want to be invincible?"
"Actually, I want to be Fred."

When are you the happiest?

"When I get to go to bed. And sleep in. And when I will be in heaven."

What is your favorite time of the day?

"Summer." (?)

What is your favorite thing about our family

"That they’re all hilarious." (Right back at you, Mr. Summer-is-my-favorite-time-of-day!)

If genie granted you 3 wishes, what would they be?

"Nothing, nothing, and nothing. I don’t want anything. I have plenty."

Would you want to ask for something for someone else?

"Shoes for the needy. Clothes. Food."

What do you want to be when you grow up

"An animal scientist."

If you could travel to one place, where would it be?

"Australia, because of the animals, like Tasmanian devils. I would go with armor on, because they (the animals) would attack me."

Do you have a joke to share?

"Okay. What do you call a rat that eats pie? A pirate."

Lily (10) is sweet, cheeky, spunky, and can climb like a monkey.

Lily painting an owl mug in MI during her special Daddy-Daughter date time. 

Lily's going to make a good momma someday!

Excerpts from the interview with Lily: 

Desert island Q – one year – 3 things: 

"My family, a lot of food, a Bible."

What do you think your husband will be like?

"Like you (dad) – that’s what I want." 
(I didn't prompt her. I promise! No children were bribed in the making of this Christmas letter.)

What’s your favorite childhood memory so far?

"My surprise 10^th birthday party. I loved that Hannah and Talitha planned all the games." 

What is your favorite Bible verse?
"Psalm 100."
And favorite truth about God?
"To know that God is love."

What person in history would you like to meet and hang out with?

"Jesus, when he was calling all the little children to hug them. I want to hug Jesus."

When are you the happiest?

"When I get to hug mommy and daddy."

What is your favorite time of the day?

"When, on a Friday, I get home from school."

What are the most important qualities in a friend?

"They have to stick with you no matter what."

If genie granted you 3 wishes, what would they be?

"That I could fly. That I could snap my fingers like Mary Poppins and things would go back in order. A perfectly organized house."

What do you want to be when you grow up?

"A volleyball player or babysit animals – doesn’t matter what kind of animals."

If you could travel to one place?

"Either Niagra Falls, Angel Falls, or Victoria Falls."

Dreams for your life

"I want to three or four or five kids. I want to work with animals and study nature."

Do you have a joke to share?

"What did the casket say to the other casket? Is that you, coffin?"

Favorite food?

"Broccoli cheddar soup (but not in a bread bowl). Rice & angel hair spaghetti."

Sam (12) is our resident lawyer, comedian, and Marvel Comics expert.

Sam and his impressive replica of Olaf.

"007" Sam and his partners in crime-fighting

We've experimented with some new forms of discipline this year.

Excerpt from the interview with Sam: 

Desert island – one year – 3 things:

"A luxury yacht."
"Sam, you're stuck on this island for a year. No escape vehicles."
"Is it like a big island, or a small island with just like a palm tree and a coconut?"
"A smaller island, and yes, with a palm trees and coconuts." 

"Okay. Bear Grylls, all the people in my immediate family who would WANT to be there with me (nice of him to give each of us the choice), and food -- enough food and water for one year. And, a hang glider – so I can fly around the island. No, no! A flying squirrel suit! And a jet pack."

           

What is your favorite Bible verse and/or truth about God?

"That he’s always there for you – even when you feel like there’s no hope or something really bad has happened. No matter what’s happened, he’ll never leave you or forsake you."

If you could be an animal for a day, which one?

"A penguin – so I would actually have an excuse for liking the cold so much. And you wouldn’t make me wear a coat."

If you could have a time machine, what time in history would you visit?

"Is this like a normal time machine, or is this like the DeLorean?"
"Either one."
"I'd go to the future. BACK to the future! Probably to see where my life would be in a few years. So I would know if I need to kill a butterfly in the past."
"WHAT?"
"You know, if you do one thing different in the past it changes the entire time stream. So, if I killed a butterfly in the past, my future would be different."

What person in history would you like to meet and hang out with?

"You, dad. (again, no bribes were distributed in the making of this Christmas letter) ... Jesus. When he raised Lazarus from the dead. Also to be there a bit before to see when Lazarus died."

If you could be a superhero, which one and why?

"Quicksilver – because he’s hilarious and he’s super fast. He’s so fast that everything around him seems to be in ultra slow motion."

Favorite movie:

"Captain America: The Winter Soldier, The Avengers, and Guardians of the Galaxy"

When are you the happiest?
"When my dad isn’t peppering me with questions for the Christmas letter."

           

What is your favorite time of the day?

(with a smirk) "Summer." (we had both gotten a kick out of Jono's "summer" answer)
           

If genie granted you 3 wishes, what would they be?

"Infinite wishes! (I’ve been preparing for that for SO LONG!)"

What do you want to be when you grow up?

"I’m not really sure. Whatever God has planned for me. ... I’d like to act in a movie."

If you could travel to one place?

"Either England, so we can hunt wild boars in a coffee shop (sorry, that's an inside joke) or New Zealand with dad – he has to be there."

Dreams for your life:

"That I will have enough money to buy my kids and my siblings' kids the best Christmas and birthday presents, and I’ll be THAT uncle. To have enough money to buy my dad a log cabin in the mountains where he can write books. And enough money so I and all my siblings and all our kids can come and visit GPA and GMA."


Hannah (14) is hard-working, conscientious, athletic and artistic.

Special daddy-daughter date time at Craig's Cruisers in MI on vacation

Hannah made 2nd team all-conference in volleyball. Beth coached the team this year.

Excerpts from the interview with Hannah: 

Desert island – one year – 3 things:

"Not a book! Pocket knife, change of clothes, and rope."

What do you think your husband will be like?

"I don’t know. Athletic. Outgoing. Considerate. Hard-working. Wants a lot of kids! Follows Jesus."

What is the hardest part about being your age?

"Having to babysit my younger siblings."

What is your favorite Bible verse?

"Philippians 4:13 & Isaiah 41:10."
Truth about God?
"He never sleeps and I can pray to him at any time because he’s always there." 

If you could be an animal for a day, which one?

"A mountain lion or grasshopper."

If you could have a time machine, what time in history would you visit?

"Back to the garden to tell Eve not to eat the fruit! ... The birth of Jesus, and when he was doing his miracles."

When are you the happiest?

"When we’re doing something as a whole family, like playing a sport or doing a craft or when we're on vacation."

What is your favorite time of the day?

"When I get to go to sleep."

What is your favorite thing about our family

"That we’re crazy and energetic."

What are the most important qualities in a friend?

"You can talk to them about anything; loving, funny."

           

If genie granted you 3 wishes, what would they be?

"The ability to fly, be 6’2”, and read people’s minds."

What do you want to be when you grow up?

"A kindergarten teacher, then stay-at-home mom (of 6 kids!), and a basketball or volleyball coach (like mom!)."

Favorite food?
"Broccoli cheddar soup and wings."

If you made it this far, you are to be commended! I think this is our longest Christmas letter to date.

As we head into 2015...

May the LORD bless you and keep you; the LORD make his face to shine upon you and be gracious to you; the LORD lift up his countenance upon you and give you his peace (Numbers 6:24-26) ... peace that only comes through Jesus, the Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6-7). He died in our place on the cross, in order to reconcile us to God and bless us with every spiritual blessing. May you richly experience that peace and those blessings over this Christmas season and in the year to come!

With much love,

The McGarveys -- Chris, Beth, Hannah, Sam, Lily, Jono, Ben

Purity Thursday: The Lies of Lust, A Siren Song

If you're familiar at all with Greek mythology, you've heard of the Sirens. They were beautiful creatures that would lure sailors to certain death with their beautiful songs. Odysseus and his crew sailed by them in Homer's epic tale. Odysseus stuffed his fellow sailors' ears with wax to guard them from this suicidal temptation. He then had them lash him to the mast under orders not to untie him no matter what.

This myth is obviously a powerful illustration of the nature and power of lust's temptations. They appear beautiful, but they will eat you alive.

I recently ran across a song called "Sirens" by The Grey Havens (all you LOTR fans know where that name comes from!) on Justin Taylor's blog. See his post to find a helpful introduction, an opportunity to download the song for free, the video embedded below, and the lyrics for the song.

The lyrics are great. Be sure to read them all. Here is the chorus, a great example of how to fight for purity:

Hold on, hold on, my heart 

You once were full and sang of grace 

Hold on, hold on, my heart 

You’ve tasted joy that’s more than this

Amen. Get this song in your head to help drown out the "Siren song" of lust when her beautiful, deadly melody begins to rise. 

Thanksgiving Assessment

I recently found these questions from Paul Tripp both convicting and helpful.

• Do you find it easier to complain than to give thanks?
• Are you easily irritated and quickly impatient?
• Do mundane hassles get under your skin?
• Would the people who live nearest to you characterize you as a thankful person or a complaining person?

• Do you look at your world and find many reasons to complain because things aren’t going your way?
• Do you look at your world and find yourself blown away at the many reasons you have every day to give thanks?

• Do you view yourself as one who has been constantly short-changed and neglected?
• Do you view yourself as one who has been showered with blessings?''

• How often do you grumble “If only I had _____” or “I wish that _____ was different”?
• How often do you whisper thanks to God or communicate thanks to those around you?

I'm not encouraged by my honest answers to these questions. I need to repent and I need grace! But God promises grace to the humble (see James 4:6). Sometimes what we most need is to see the pride underneath our ungrateful spirit. Then we can repent, be humbled, and receive the grace that gives thanks.